No matter which team you want to win this weekend's big game (and who doesn't love the commercials?) everyone seems to be buzzing about football. In honor of the Superbowl XLIV I'm sharing some of my favorite football quotes. Use them to impress your friends on Sunday and to add some yardage to upcoming marketing materials whether promoting a youth or adult football program.
Most football teams are temperamental. That's 90% temper and 10% mental.
-Doug Plank
One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best.
- Alan Shearer
I'd rather play in front of a full house than an empty crowd.
- Johnny Giles
Individual commitment to a group effort -- that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work.
- Vince Lombardi
Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become.
- Mary McGrory
I learned that if you want to make it bad enough, no matter how bad it is, you can make it.
- Gale Sayers
When in doubt, punt!
- John Heisman
The road to Easy Street goes through the sewer.
- John Madden
Maybe a good rule in life is never become too important to do your own laundry.
- Barry Sanders
It's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog.
- Archie Griffen
Pro football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors.
- Frank Gifford
Football isn't a contact sport, it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.
- Duffy Daugherty
I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know, important -like a league game or something.
- Dick Butkus
Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.
- Joe Theismann
Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it.
- Heywood Hale Broun
I'd catch a punt naked, in the snow, in Buffalo, for a chance to play in the NFL.
- Steve Henderson
Football is not a game but a religion, a metaphysical island of fundamental truth in a highly verbalized, disguised society, a throwback of 30,000 generations of anthropological time.
- ArnoldMandell
American football makes rugby look like a Tupperware party.
- Sue Lawley
I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.
- Terry Bradshaw
College football is a sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture.
- Elbert Hubbard
Let's face it, you have to have a slightly recessive gene that has a little something to do with the brain to go out on the football field and beat your head against other human beings on a daily basis.
-Tim Green
You have to play this game like somebody just hit your mother with a two-by-four.
-Dan Birdwell
Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings.
-George F. Will
Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
-Erma Bombeck
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
-Erma Bombeck
If you're mad at your kid, you can either raise him to be a nose tackle or send him out to play on the freeway. It's about the same.
-Bob Golic
At the base of it was the urge, if you wanted to play football, to knock someone down, that was what the sport was all about, the will to win closely linked with contact.
-George Plimpton
Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?
-Jim Bouton
One of the great disappointments of a football game is that the cheerleaders never seem to get injured.
-Author Unknown
When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team.
-George Raveling
The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
-Phyllis Diller
I do not like football, which I think of as a game in which two tractors approach each other from opposite directions and collide. Besides, I have contempt for a game in which players have to wear so much equipment. Men play basketball in their underwear, which seems just right to me.
-Anna Quindlen, Living Out Loud, 1988
Watching football is like watching pornography. There's plenty of action, and I can't take my eyes off it, but when it's over, I wonder why the hell I spent an afternoon doing it.
-Luke Salisbury
The Rose Bowl is the only bowl I've ever seen that I didn't have to clean.
-Erma Bombeck
There are two kinds of people in the world, Notre Dame lovers and Notre Dame haters. And, quite frankly, they're both a pain in the ass.
-Dan Devine, former Notre Dame football coach
I like to believe that my best hits border on felonious assault.
-Jack Tatum
He was the only man I ever saw who ran his own interference.
-Steve Owen, about Bronko Nagurski
Trying to maintain order during a legalized gang brawl involving 80 toughs with a little whistle, a hanky and a ton of prayer.
-Anonymous referee, explaining his job
There are several differences between a football game and a revolution. For one thing, a football game usually lasts longer and the participants wear uniforms. Also, there are usually more casualties in a football game. The object of the game is to move a ball past the other team's goal line. This counts as six points. No points are given for lacerations, contusions, or abrasions, but then no points are deducted, either. Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally.
-Alfred Hitchcock
Men are clinging to football on a level we aren't even aware of. For centuries, we ruled everything, and now, in the last ten minutes, there are all these incursions by women. It's our Alamo.
-Tony Kornheiser
Speed is not your fastest, but your slowest man. No back can run faster than his interference.
-Jock Sutherland
When it comes to football, God is prejudiced - toward big, fast kids.
-Chuck Mills
Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.
-Merle Kessler
Speed, strength, and the inability to register pain immediately.
-Reggie Williams, when asked his greatest strengths as a football player
The tactical difference between Association Football and Rugby with its varieties seems to be that in the former the ball is the missile, in the latter men are the missiles.
-Alfred E. Crawley, The Book of the Ball, 1913
What about football? Is it a sport or a concussion?
-Jim Murray, Los Angeles Times
Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it's important.
-Eugene J. McCarthy
I don't like to lose, and that isn't so much because it is just a football game, but because defeat means the failure to reach your objective. I don't want a football player who doesn't take defeat to heart, who laughs it off with the thought, 'Oh, well, there's another Saturday.' The trouble in American life today, in business as well as in sports, is that too many people are afraid of competition. The result is that in some circles people have come to sneer at success if it costs hard work and training and sacrifice.
-Knute Kenneth Rockne
In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard.
-Theodore Roosevelt
Describing an opposing team: Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck.
- Don Shula
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